What Your Mommy Blogger Wants You to Know: She’s Not Perfect

Not perfectThe other day, I noticed a lot of people finding my blog via Pinterest. I am not on Pinterest, so I followed the link and found a picture linking to my post about creating mind jars with my children. Someone commented on the link, “I kind of wanted to punch her, but I like that idea.” And another person responded, “I feel that way when I read parenting blogs, too.”

Oh, Pinterest. The exquisite handmade crafts, the gourmet lunches for toddlers, the gorgeously decorated homes. It all looks so perfect.

I am far from perfect.

Mommy blogs are not about “perfect parenting.” Perfection is unhealthy and unattainable.

Parenting, like yoga, like meditation, like life, is a practice.

We learn from our mistakes, we accept advice from others, and we strive to improve. To become better. Not perfect.

Parenting process

So if you’ve ever wanted to punch a mommy blogger because you envision her…

polishing an already-immaculately-clean stainless-steel kitchen, complete with homemade cork-board note stations, color-coded for each member of the family,

while serving organic quinoa and kale salad to her children, who ask, with Dickensian sweetness, “Please may I have a little more?”,

then effortlessly proceeding to clean up a four-alarm, ten-wipe diaper blowout while maintaining a serene Buddha smile,

and then praising her children for composing variations on Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony…

… I’m sharing a list of things that you probably don’t know about her, and the things she probably wants you to know.

I would guess that …

… she might be really frustrated that her four-year-old still isn’t potty trained.

… her kids have probably told her she’s “really mean” and “just as bad as Mother Gothel.”

… she likely loses her cool somedays and yells at her children.

… her children have probably seen every episode of Sofia the First, and know the theme songs to Jake and the Pirates, Little Einsteins, and Dora the Explorer by heart.

live imperfection

… she most likely doesn’t find time for yoga or meditation or exercise every day. In fact, she may consider her gym membership a donation to the community.

… her children have probably gotten in trouble at school for things like, say, sending board game pieces flying because their turn was skipped in a game, or poking a kid in the eye. {These are purely hypothetical.}

… she has no doubt served several of the following, at one time or another, and called it “dinner”: pancakes, cereal, popcorn, Eggo waffles, or nachos.

… her children, we can assume, get into arguments multiple times a day. Hitting, hair pulling, and the word “poopy-butt” are probably involved.

be human

… her children presumably throw tantrums over things like mixing the exact same cereal from two different boxes.

… she, in all probability, has taken her iPhone with her to the park and checked Twitter while her children play.

… I would even speculate that one time, a mommy-blogger-who-shall-remain-nameless, who writes about mindful awareness, was once so busy making dinner and then rushing out the door to soccer practice, that she left the dog outside and he was found wandering the streets an hour later by a kind neighbor.

But I’m just guessing on these.

Nobody’s perfect.

Self-criticism

There are some other things I would guess that mommy blogger wants you to know…

:: She’s not mad at you for wanting to punch her.

:: One of her biggest fears she had when she started her blog was, in all likelihood, that people would want to punch her because they thought of her as preachy, or a know-it-all.

:: I think she would want to tell you that she doesn’t have it all figured out. In fact, I would bet her blog is an exercise in learning more about parenting.

:: Perhaps she would tell you that her blog is a bit like a Facebook page ~ it provides you glimpses of her life and thoughts a few days a week. And we all know that there is a lot more to people than what can be conveyed online. {Especially on Pinterest}.

:: Most likely, she would tell you that she wants her blog to be uplifting and inspiring, so she {sometimes agonizingly} works to balance portraying the honest reality of motherhood with positive messages and helpful stories.

:: Presumably, she wants to learn from her readers, and would love to hear how they navigate the journey of motherhood, too.

And I am absolutely certain the last thing she wants is for you to read her blog, and then judge yourself as a mother. I bet she hopes instead that you read and experience a connection, a “me too!” moment in which you see our common humanity.  

Above all, she wants you to visit her blog and know that mothers are not alone. 

Brown imperfection

She wants you to know that we all go through this collectively, and we are better when we practice the art of motherhood together.

Because no one is perfect.

Sarah Rudell Beach
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