Let’s Not Make Today “Most Days”

Let’s not make today “most days.”

Those words are from Dallas Police Chief David Brown, when he spoke at a news conference in July 2016 after the shooting of police officers in Dallas, TX. He told reporters, “We don’t feel much support most days. Let’s not make today most days.”

That line echoes in my head each time we confront a new tragedy — a school shooting, a suicide, an act of terrorism, or, most recently, the horrifying images of children being separated from their parents at our nation’s border.

I think these words still ring in my head, almost two years later, because of the specific words Chief David Brown used; he didn’t employ the passive phrasing of “Let’s not let today be most days.” He said,

LET’S NOT MAKE TODAY MOST DAYS.

Because we MAKE our todays. Right now, we are making our tomorrow.

In mindfulness, we teach that how we meet the current moment will inform what happens in the next moment. Our days are comprised of approximately 20,000 breaths and 100,000 heartbeats, and in all of them we have a choice:

How am I going to BE in this moment — in this family, in this community, in this nation, and in this world?

If our choice is to make today “most days,” then we’re in for a lot more suffering and heartbreak.

If we choose to make today “most days,” it means that about 48 children will be separated from their parents at the border.

It means 1 in every 5 American children is living in poverty.

If today is “most days,” it means that, somewhere in the United States, a mass shooting will occur. (There were 372 mass shootings in the US in 2015).

It means that, somewhere in the United States, a cop either died yesterday, or will die today or tomorrow, in the line of duty. (128 police officers died in the line of duty in 2017).

It means that one out of every three children you meet today has admitted to bullying someone at school.

It means that 89 Americans will die today due to gun violence.

It means that almost 900 million people in the world have less than $1.90 to live on today.

It means that one out of every four Americans you meet today do not have EVEN ONE PERSON they can confide in.

It means that today, 493 people will be killed in an active conflict somewhere in the world. (In 2014, there were 180,000 fatalities in 42 global conflicts).

LET’S NOT MAKE TODAY MOST DAYS.

I know the statistics are overwhelming. You may be asking, “Where do we start?”

We start right here. In this moment, with this breath.

“Waking up this morning, I smile.

Twenty-four brand new hours are before me.

I vow to live fully in each moment and to look at all beings with eyes of compassion.”

Thich Nhat Hanh

There may not be much in the news right now that’s making you smile, but you have, right now, the gift of a new day, of another twenty-four hours.

What will you do with them? How will you BE in the world today?

I fully admit to being THAT PERSON who wholeheartedly believes it is our compassion that will make all the difference.

Because compassion is not mere sympathy; it’s not passive “thoughts and prayers.” Compassion is a state in which we feel the suffering of another and we are compelled to do something to alleviate that suffering.

Compassion is about ACTION.

It’s about, as Thich Nhat Hanh says, living fully in each moment — truly seeing and understanding what is happening around us, instead of interpreting the present moment through the lens of our (usually paranoid and delusional) stories about the world. When we can see the moment for what it is, we can take informed and inspired ACTION to make the situation better, instead of contracting, retreating, and shutting down, or lashing out in habitual and unskillful ways.

Being mindful is not just living in the moment, it’s looking at the moment. It’s seeing the actual human being behind the media stories and tweets and rumors. It means we see a person and not a parody, we see an individual and not an invention.

It’s when our assumptions about categories of people interfere with our human interactions with this person, this asylum-seeker, or this immigrant in this moment that tragedy can occur.

Which means we must not only see the other person, but we must see ourselves. What assumptions and prejudices do we carry? What view of the world do we operate from? How does that inform how we choose to act in this world?

The problems facing our world right now are BIG problems — devastating governmental policies, institutional racism, gun violence, homegrown terrorism, xenophobia, misogyny, and homophobia, to name just a few.

And when we stare up at BIG problems, we can feel pretty small. We might wonder if there’s anything that WE can do that would actually, you know, make a difference. We might feel paralyzed, which means we don’t act at all, which means, through our inaction. . .

WE MAKE TODAY “MOST DAYS.”

Your actions don’t have to be BIG to make a difference. They just need to happen.

You can:

Volunteer in your community.

Donate to organizations that can do the “on the ground” work that you may not be able to do. (See Slate’s list of organizations you can support that are helping migrant families at the US border).

Read a book that challenges your view of the world and asks you to see the world through someone else’s eyes.

Talk to your children — about race or religion or immigration or guns or safety or sexuality or consent or feelings — just talk.

Educate yourself about the upcoming elections — and VOTE.

Contact your elected officials and tell them what matters to you. (Click here to find your US representatives and see how they have voted on recent issues — and find their contact information!)

Attend a rally or an informational meeting.

Join an action group in your community.

Pay attention. Open your heart. And take inspired action.

Just imagine what “most days” would be like if we all did that.