One of the most common questions people ask me is, “How do I even get started meditating?”
It’s usually quickly followed up with “What do I do? How should I sit? How long should I sit? Are there books I should read??”
And sometimes a week later they’ll report, “Well, I tried it, and nothing happened. Am I doing it wrong???”
I LOVE getting these questions! It seems every day we’re learning more and more about the wonderful benefits a meditation practice can provide. Some researchers have found that as little as 12 minutes a day of meditation over an eight-week period can produce noticeable changes in the brain, decrease levels of anxiety, and increase immune function and overall happiness and well-being.
And while meditation is a simple practice, it’s not always easy.
Starting Your Meditation Practice
How Long Should I Meditate?
If you are new to meditation, I recommend starting slowly. Start with just 5 minutes each day. Gradually increase the time over several weeks. When I started meditating, five minutes felt like an eternity. I now practice for 30 minutes a day, and sometimes I am surprised at how quickly it passes!
Where Should I Meditate?
Find a comfortable spot where you can sit. You can sit on the floor (using a pillow or cushion for support if needed) or sit upright in a chair, with your feet resting on the floor.
Some people recommend that you do not lie down on your back, but I think you should meditate in whatever pose works for you {unless lying down makes you fall asleep!} I love Jon Kabat-Zinn’s description of the ideal meditation posture as one that “embodies dignity and wakefulness.” You want to be upright, but not rigid and tight (upright, NOT uptight! 😉 )
You can meditate anywhere, but I like having a special place in my home for my practice. You can learn more about creating a meditation space in your home here.
What Do I Do?
The easiest meditation technique is to count the breath. I count each in-breath and out-breath with the same number. So my mind focuses on “One” {in-breath}, “One” {out-breath}, “Two” {in-breath}, “Two” {out-breath}, and so on. Once I hit 10 {which rarely happens before my mind has wandered!} I start over at one. If you don’t like counting, you can simply repeat to yourself “in, out…. in, out…”
When your mind wanders ~ which it WILL DO {that’s what the mind does!} ~ gently guide your attention back to your breath. If you need to start over counting because you don’t remember where you left off, that’s fine! The key is to not criticize or judge yourself for letting your attention wander. In fact …
noticing that your mind has wandered is the whole point of meditation ~ you are becoming more aware of the actions of your mind!
Even the relatively simple instruction to “follow the breath” can sound a bit vague or confusing. A helpful technique is to bring your attention to where you most notice the sensation of the breath — in the chest and lungs? the nose? the belly? That is your anchor. Each time your mind wanders, come back to the physical sensations of breathing.
When thoughts arise, it’s easy to get distracted and follow them and engage them and solve them and interrogate them…. A helpful practice is to simply label the thoughts: “worrying,” “planning,” “remembering.” Don’t worry about figuring out the precise label for the type of thought you’re having. Just “thinking” will do, too!
And if the thoughts don’t go away? It’s still okay. Chade-Meng Tan writes in Search Inside Yourself, “When we let go of something that distracts our meditation, we are gently inviting it to stop distracting us, but we generously allow it to decide whether or not it wants to stay.”
I love that description of the practice.
How Do I Fit This Into My Day?
Find the time of day that works best for you. Some people like to begin their day with meditation, others prefer to take a break for meditation at lunch, and for others the best time to meditate is in the evening.
The important thing is to make it a habit. After many weeks of a consistent practice, it will become an integral part of your day, like exercising or brushing your teeth! (And forget the advice that says you just need to do it for 21 days. The latest research says you need about 66 days for something to become routine).
Changing your habits over a period of time actually creates new neural networks in your brain, and the practice will become part of your daily routine. {You can read more about how to change your habits to support your meditation practice here.}
Bumps Along the Road
But Nothing’s Happening!
Meditation is about non-judgmental awareness. We need to not bring expectations into our practice. You may experience a moment of profound insight during a meditation session. Or you might be really bored. You might feel restless and agitated. Or you might feel calm and relaxed.
Meditation is about embracing whatever is in the present moment. The benefits of meditation — greater self-awareness and self-control, increased calm and empathy — will emerge over time. But each individual session will be completely different. {I experienced a few years ago on a silent meditation retreat — you can read more about that here.}
So if you’re bored, just note, “This is what boredom feels like.” If you’re content, note, “This is what contentment feels like.”
My {back, knees, ankles…} Hurt!!
Technically, there ARE no problems in meditation. But if you’re experiencing physical pain, there are things you can do to make yourself more comfortable. Check out this post for some suggestions.
Is There an App for That?
Of course! Many meditation apps have cool features such as interval bells {great for calling your attention back to the breath}, customizable background sounds, and interactive features. My favorite is the Insight Meditation Timer: they have lots of guided meditations, but overall it’s very simple and easy to use. And I just smile every time I see their new slogan each morning:
Other apps that you may find helpful:
Additional Resources
Want more information? Check out the following links:
MINDFULNESS 101 ~ FREE seven-day class!
Meditation for Beginners ~ 20 tips from zenhabits {great site!}
Mindfulness: The Basics from mindful.org
A great book for beginners is Mark Williams and Danny Penman’s Mindfulness: An Eight-Week Plan for Finding Peace in a Frantic World.
You can also check out my resources page.
Happy practicing!
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